Keeping Consistency With Nesting

Nesting is an arrangement in which the parents agree to rotate in and out of the marital home while the children continue to reside in the marital home full time. The parents create a schedule where only one parent is at home with the children at any given time — for example, mom is in the home on Monday and Tuesday, and every other weekend; and dad is in the home on Wednesday, Thursday, and every other weekend.

When one of the parents is not residing in the marital home, a great cost savings option is to stay with friends or family members. If that option is not available, the parents may decide to rent a small apartment for each parent to use when they are not residing in the marital home.

Some of the benefits of a nesting arrangement include:

• The children continue to live under one roof (and the same roof as before the divorce), keeping their lives more consistent.

• Saving money, especially in circumstances where the parents don’t need to rent an apartment.

• Allowing the children to stay in the same school district and keeping the same friends.

Potential cons of nesting:

• The parents are still sharing a living space (and potentially two living spaces).

• There could be privacy issues, especially if one party has a significant other who would be spending time at the shared apartment.

• Nesting is likely not going to work for high-conflict couples.

The most important thing for parents to remember about this type of living arrangement is to first establish the ground rules and set some boundaries. If possible, the parties should also come up with a plan to designate exclusive living spaces for each parent in both the marital home and rental apartment. It’s also important to have a conversation about significant others and, of course, sharing the bills for both the marital home and the shared apartment.

If you would like to learn more about nesting, or have any other divorce-related questions, please reach out.